So, more than ever, it has become clear to me that I need to disconnect from the news and internet feeds. This is because, while I know it to be true, it has become even more toxic, as people are doubling down on trying to escape into the internet realm, and, sadly, their mob mentality is stronger because people are less likely to research or accept nuance.
Before I jump too deeply into this, I want to take a step back and remind people that it’s completely alright to have different opinions and worldviews. In fact, I think that is what makes us better people. Being able to listen to others’ thoughts and opinions on things is important. This way, we can gain a better understanding and realize how people can live with different opinions. That said, there are moral grounds, and I understand and respect those who wish to stand on their morals.
Linux Community
I have recently been re-engaging with the Linux community and have been realizing there are major issues, from the outside in, that I have ignored for years. Look, I’ve been a Linux user since I was like 12 years old, and that is saying a lot, considering I am now 34 as of writing this. In that time, I agree the community has always been extremely opinionated. While I do appreciate that about the community… it has caused some issues that I think need better behavior.
I have noticed for a long time now that people tend to be very gatekeeping when it comes to things in the Linux community. In my opinion, this has been one of the major reasons that have really hurt the community in the early days. I will say I am happy to see such a resurgence in diverse communities adopting Linux. With that said, that does come with communities that are less than pleasant to work with. That said, I think that is one of our key strengths, allowing folks to build what they prefer and create different standards. It does also speak to certain technologies breaking through, but people always forking and maintaining their own ways if they want.
I find it annoying how people dog on systemd compared to other init systems. Personally, I think it has been a great change, and I see why so many distributions have moved to adopt it. The drama that tends to flare up here and there always seems to be either misunderstandings, like the age field being added, or no actual age verification functionality. Then the more recent drama around it being a “possible” new hook for Flatpaks going forward. I get people’s passion; we all have it when we grow attached to things. You can fork and keep things the way they are for you, but eventually, the actual users who are not tied to social media and want things to work will adopt whatever works best for them.
I am just wishing that, rather than people being so toxic and blowing up on people without fully understanding the topics, they would just read or listen to headlines/highlights and not realize things are current discussions. Secondly, if you actually care about how things work… perhaps get involved more. I know that is hard, with many of us, myself included, just exhausted and overworked… That said, take to places for official project communication, be respectful, and describe your concerns to the development team so they can respond without feeling attacked. Because when we don’t take this step back and are respectful… this is how we lose amazing developers/contributors to projects, because people attack without trying to be respectful. Remember, you are using something someone has volunteered to maintain and build… even if you donated a chunk of money to them here or there… You gotta remember that doesn’t entitle you to demand things.
Furry Drama
Much like the Linux community, I notice ongoing cycles in the Furry community that I have been part of for years. Where people often feel so nervous about saying or doing things, for fear of being attacked or pushed over the edge. That said, if you actually go to a convention or hang out with the actual people, even in more relaxed online spaces (aka not X, TikTok, Twitch, etc.), but in more communal spaces like VR or Discord channels. You will realize everyone is just people, and they want to be people. I have found myself making lots of new friends and folks when I started making a tiny bit of content when I have a second. Some people, yeah, do let stuff go to their heads… but that isn’t just the furry community; it’s anyone who ends up gaining some following. The thing I am realizing is that online echo chambers seem to keep causing this divide. It is one of the big reasons, I like using platforms that don’t use algorythms to force us down into these echo-chambers and then we are impressionable and then end up latching onto the things people we like say and follow and get shoveled stuff that keeps us going down that rabbit hole… and well the sad thing is you see there is a lot of the resurgence in the drama of different niche kinks that people find distasteful or even try to link directly to things they may consider abnormal.
Just to be clear, I do agree there are some major issues in the fandom towards things like drug use, misogyny, heterophobia, and even grooming. I don’t want to say that it doesn’t happen because I have been to cons, I have several friends who are straight, and know of friends who were groomed as minors. These things are not ok, and should be called out! No, however about it… If you see someone being a dick to women or straight folks, someone engaging with minors inappropriately, or people messing around with hard substances they are not prescribed… CALL THAT SHIT OUT!!! Do it ethically, do it to the person’s face, not their back, and don’t take it to social media; that can cause a person to end their life if you’ve gotten it wrong.
I am just getting really tired of the behavior of people around here who try to ruin others’ lives without knowing the full story. Also, it isn’t your place to do a call-out piece on social media, as they often end up getting the person more attention, which can boost people willing to go learn their side, where they can manipulate back even if you have evidence. What you should do is focus on talking to them directly, get your facts straight, and yes, if that doesn’t work and they continue… as much as I hate saying it… go through the proper legal channels and not go to social media, but let others you personally know who are interacting know your “personal experience,” not what someone else told you. It is scientifically proven that every time someone repeats a story, details change.
Conclusion
I have a lot more I wanna say, but I have been holding back this blog post for some time now, so I think I need to finish up this one and work on another later with more details. However, I am not opposed and always open to hearing your feedback. I am on the Fediverse at @hack13@cyberfurz.social, which is bridged to Bluesky. You can message @hack13.one there, and it will go to my Mastodon, where I will see it.
